'Difficult' depends on 'in what way?' but either of my longfics for this year qualify. They were definitely my most difficult things to write, even though I may waffle over which was more difficult than the other.
breath (and all the ways of holding) was difficult in terms of just taking the longest, having to do research on various bits and fitting them back and then requiring several significant revisions to smooth out the pacing and delete (and add) scenes. Because it spanned a decade's worth of canon, I had to constantly recheck events and refresh my memory to check where I wanted to be canon-compliant and where I was just going to break away completely. Plus just...*vague hand waving* a longer emotional arc and trying to convey the complexities of a relationship with flawed people and poor communication but that still winds up in a promise to do better and trying to embrace the idea that people can be flawed, make mistakes, but still ultimately want to be there for one another and try to make up for their past missteps.
It was difficult in terms of craftsmanship and writing, essentially.
The New Normal was shorter than breath (and all the ways of holding and was set between games, so there were less moving parts for me to watch out for. So it was easier, in that sense. More emotionally draining in others because it deals with some heavy topics with regards to mental health, medication, and me trying to balance a line with Janey's love and support being important for Athena's recovery but also trying to stay away from implying that a good relationship is all that's necessary to 'fix' bad brains. It was also more personal in terms of me writing about depression, and more difficult in that way. Because as much as I want to focus on the craftsmanship of a fic, the writing and storytelling aspects, when I put something in that feels more personal it's more difficult for me to remain impartial, and to get my own pride or ego tangled up with outside validation.
So! Both were difficult, just hard for me to pick one as being more difficult than the other. But those were my two most difficult finished projects for the year.
The WIP project that's the most difficult is still Danse Does Vegas. *shrug emoji* It's a lot of smut in search of an emotional core, and I have resigned myself to being unable to make genuine progress with it until I reoutline the whole thing.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-12-31 04:05 am (UTC)breath (and all the ways of holding) was difficult in terms of just taking the longest, having to do research on various bits and fitting them back and then requiring several significant revisions to smooth out the pacing and delete (and add) scenes. Because it spanned a decade's worth of canon, I had to constantly recheck events and refresh my memory to check where I wanted to be canon-compliant and where I was just going to break away completely. Plus just...*vague hand waving* a longer emotional arc and trying to convey the complexities of a relationship with flawed people and poor communication but that still winds up in a promise to do better and trying to embrace the idea that people can be flawed, make mistakes, but still ultimately want to be there for one another and try to make up for their past missteps.
It was difficult in terms of craftsmanship and writing, essentially.
The New Normal was shorter than breath (and all the ways of holding and was set between games, so there were less moving parts for me to watch out for. So it was easier, in that sense. More emotionally draining in others because it deals with some heavy topics with regards to mental health, medication, and me trying to balance a line with Janey's love and support being important for Athena's recovery but also trying to stay away from implying that a good relationship is all that's necessary to 'fix' bad brains. It was also more personal in terms of me writing about depression, and more difficult in that way. Because as much as I want to focus on the craftsmanship of a fic, the writing and storytelling aspects, when I put something in that feels more personal it's more difficult for me to remain impartial, and to get my own pride or ego tangled up with outside validation.
So! Both were difficult, just hard for me to pick one as being more difficult than the other. But those were my two most difficult finished projects for the year.
The WIP project that's the most difficult is still Danse Does Vegas. *shrug emoji* It's a lot of smut in search of an emotional core, and I have resigned myself to being unable to make genuine progress with it until I reoutline the whole thing.